Time and Space

I often contemplate the concepts of the great and tortured Virginia Woolf. This week, her specific observation about the necessity of having "A room of ones own" to achieve professional success has grabbed me.  hmmm. (insert exasperated sigh here) Yep,  that chick never had kids. I'm embarrassed  to admit I spent many a college seminar really wondering publicly why so few women become engineers, ,..and now it's hit me like a cartoon piano.   Careers that require a lot of alone time, paper work, and cocktail after parties are near impossible if you've got a wee wonderful monster underfoot.  For those without kids,.. take heed---bringing a toddler with you anywhere is like traveling with an untethered goat.

You've heard it all before but YES,.. Moms across the board, and nursing mothers in particular know the challenge of finding a bit of personal space and time to ones own.  (It's been ages since I clicked a door shut and was able to just breath my own air!) Sometimes *agh* I feel like my life is just damage control. BUT- and here's the big and beautiful 'but' here; motherhood has made me appreciate the time I have SO much more.  I don't waste it as much and I'm less likely to obsess about things I might've before.  No use crying over spilt milk, I can always make more.

 I found myself telling a friend the other day that  nursing was like forced meditation, and as is often the case, once I said it- only then did I realize how true it is. It is the time when the mind must go quiet to make it work.  When I can do nothing else but let my body work, I find myself unknowing going over the chord progression to the "Tiger rag" or what have you-  ha* thank god dirk finally got a fiddle mute! He calls this the "marriage saver", ... I imagine because he's become aware that diminished scales are fun for a half an hour,...and then not for everyone!,....  I digress~ The point is,...you can travel the world without leaving your sometimes crowded room,  Thank you George Harrison! I argue the accepted notion that you need a silly old room to center yourself, though I admit it's a bit more challenging.  A recipe for success is a dash of proper patience and a good stir. It's true- at times you can achieve better practice not playing your instrument than playing it (and I really wouldn't  say this unless I had seen some results).   A room no doubt can be an aid, but either way (with one or with out), silence takes effort, discipline and the benefit of a healthy challenge. 

In my most silent moments the best songs come on. So for all the rest of us fertile-myrtle's Mama's out there,..don't worry! The room in your heart and head can always be expanded upon, renovated, redecorated -plus it's private, and there is plenty of it for ripe-and ready for your amazing mind tingling, earth shaking, creations.
oh boy I had better stop typing and,...